Black Hole’s and Strange Attractors: The Science Behind America’s Middle East Policies

By Michael Ryan

As you may already know, Black Holes are super dense usually stellar objects that warp space-time to such an extent that nothing can escape their gravitational pull…including light. As to Strange Attractors, we will address this ‘elegant’ phenomenon later.

Bet you didn’t know that according to at least one new “scientific theory” Black Holes can exist anywhere and be of any size… from the recognized stellar monsters to tiny microscopic ones that may even reside in your living room. According to the “theory,” Black Holes are responsible for the alleged weirdness allegedly observed in the so called Bermuda Triangle. Also, it might just turn out that the teeny Black Hole is responsible for your lost keys, wallets, purses…and common sense.

So what does this have to do with the US’s policy in the Middle East?

However absurd this “new theory” may be, I can see that there might be one legitimate phenomenon that can be explained by the purported existence of these rogue “local” Black Holes…The war in Iraq. It appears that there may be some amount of credibility to the notion that not only do these ‘tiny local Black Holes’ exist but our scientist’s can actually create a local Black Hole…again this would go a long way to explaining why currently everything…money, armies, Jihadists, Crusaders, Oil Companies et al…has seemingly been sucked into the locus that is Iraq.

Let us assume for the sake of argument, that our scientists have discovered a way to create local Black Holes. And let us assume that Bush understood his advisors when they told him that we could force the attention of the Jihadists away from the US proper by creating a Black Hole in the Middle East by invading and then occupying Iraq. His reasoning might be: if we can create a unbelievably strong locus where the Jihadists can gather and wage their Holy War against America outside of the US, we at home will be free from their attacks. Bush can then take credit for keeping the Fatherland free from another 9/11 event and he and his and crony’s vision of the new World Order can be realized once control of Iraq’s Oil Reserves is achieved.

What an Idea! We get the Saracen off our backs here at home, we get their Oil, we get a strategic position in the Middle East from which we can operate…and we can prove, once and for all, that the real reason you can’t find your keys is because of these man made tiny black holes!

A side benefit, it could be argued, is that the creation of the Black Hole in Iraq allows Bush to argue for consistent and seemingly non-ending support and funding for said W(ar)I(n)I(raq) from the Congress. (WII)

Another interesting, possibly relevant scientific phenomenon that might be used to illustrate the Bush Administration’s insistence that things are going well in the WII , is the Strange Attractor. A Strange Attractor for you non-Scientists, is a very “beautiful” mathematical set of equations that when graphed looks very much like a pair of butterfly’s wings. The Attractor is meant to represent chaotic systems over time…and interestingly enough appears as a distinct pattern, that is to say, although it represents chaos, it looks orderly…even predictable.

Apparently, we have a Strange Attractor in Iraq. We are being told that things are going well… Iraq is close to attaining that all powerful Great Thing we call Democracy and will soon become a partner of the US. However, with the help of common sense and a very rare little thing called ‘Facts,’ most of the people of the World see the WII as Chaotic and out of control.

Yes, it does look as though Iraq is following an ‘orderly’ pattern of progress toward Democracy, and yes ‘fewer’ US soldiers are being killed, (though Iraqi’s who are ‘working’ with the US are dying in droves), and yet if one were to carefully scrutinize the details of this whole ‘orderly’ picture, one could see that the Strange Attraction called Iraq is really just Chaos and completely out of control.

So with the Bush regime’s creation of the “Man-Made-Local-Black-Hole” and the “Strange Attractor” in Iraq, it is clear that at least one Nobel Prize for such achievement’s is all but guaranteed. Perhaps a new category can be created to reflect such a monumental accomplishment…it can be called: “Creative Political Physics!”

In closing, I cite an excerpt from Robin Wright, Washington Post Staff Writer’s piece on Ryan Crocker in Jan of 2007…

“In late 2002, as the Bush administration prepared for war, then-Secretary of State Colin L. Powell tasked (Ryan) Crocker and Assistant Secretary of State William Burns with exploring the risks of military intervention. The result was a six-page memo they entitled “The Perfect Storm,” according to an account in Washington Post reporter Karen DeYoung’s biography “Soldier: The Life of Colin Powell.”

The memo bluntly predicted that toppling Hussein could unleash long-repressed sectarian and ethnic tensions, that the Sunni minority would not easily relinquish power, and that powerful neighbors such as Iran, Syria and Saudi Arabia would try to move in to influence events. It also cautioned that the United States would have to start from scratch building a political and economic system because Iraq’s infrastructure was in tatters.” (my emphasis)

(Quoted from: A Diplomat Who Loves The Really Tough Jobs By Robin Wright Washington Post Staff Writer Thursday, January 11, 2007; C01)

Technorati Tags: Commentary, Iraq, Politics